Artism

Make friends with an artist.
She will ask why aren't you creating and she won't be quilting you, she'll honestly want to know.
And you'll both be sitting in a cafe, you with your latte, her with her chai, and you'll watch her create, face drawn with concentration.

You'll find yourself staring and wondering what kind of void she's crossed in order to do that.

Not everyone creates, what's different about those that do?

Something fundamental, something learned, something won as a success or a response to a failure?

My creation is written. It's also stagnant and deriviative. It's in need of repetition and the time and energy to create and recreate until it shines thru as original. 10,000 hours needed to master something and I've spent so much time stagnating myself. Creator and creation. Pretty pathetic, really. 

But every creator must go thru something similar, the pain of creating something that isn't quite right, not quite perfect. But you have to struggle anyway, otherwise nothing will ever agree with your inner vision. That perfect creation in your soul.

So you end up watching your artist friend create, seemingly effortlessly, tho you know she'd hit you for saying that. And you think maybe its ok that you're still so far behind, because there she is, bringing her creation to life and it's perfect.